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October 30, 2007

For all you over-achievers

What does it mean to "give 100%"? What does it mean to give more than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We've all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%?

So what makes up 100% in life? Here's a mathematical approach that might help you answer these questions.

If we substitute
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26
for
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z,
then
H A R D W O R K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and
K N O W L E D G E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%.

But wait!

A T T I T U D E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

and
B U L L S H I T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%.

Now look how far ass-kissing will take you:
A S S K I S S I N G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%.

So one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while hard work and knowledge will get you close, and attitude will get you there, it's the bullshit and the ass-kissing that will put you over the top.

Posted by joke du jour at October 30, 2007 06:47 PM

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