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December 31, 2012

News bloopers

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Fork taken

Here's one of Miss Cellania's Top 20 Weird News Stories of 2012

The Fork in the Road is Taken

The headlines just write themselves.

A six-foot-tall fork appeared in Carlsbad, California, in the traffic island at the intersection of Levante Street and Anillo Way on Tuesday [October 16]. The unnamed artist is a 62-year-old retired teacher who said he was impressed by the joke in The Muppet Movie in which the characters encounter a giant silverware fork when they are looking for a fork in the road. Carlsbad residents got a kick out of the sculpture, but a city crew removed it on Wednesday. Another resident erected a sign in its place that says "Why the fork not?" which the city also removed. Then residents then began taping real, normal-sized forks to a nearby sign. A spokesperson for the city said the sculpture is a code violation

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December 28, 2012

Aurora at Whitehorse

This is 1 of 53 images in the Best nature pictures of 2012 at The Big Picture.

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Swirls of green and red appeared in an aurora over Whitehorse, Yukon. The aurora was due to the interaction of a coronal mass ejection (CME) from the sun with Earth's magnetosphere. (David Cartier, Sr./NASA via Reuters ) #

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What's that smell? (2)

Formal Reprimand Issued To Flatulent Federal Worker

DECEMBER 21--A federal employee was formally reprimanded this month for excessive workplace flatulence, a sanction that was delivered to him in a five-page letter that actually included a log of representative dates and times when he was recorded "releasing the awful and unpleasant odor" in his Baltimore office.

In a December 10 letter accusing him of "conduct unbecoming a federal officer," the Social Security Administration employee was informed that his "uncontrollable flatulence" had created an "intolerable" and "hostile" environment for coworkers, several of whom have lodged complaints with supervisors.

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Advanced uselessness

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December 27, 2012

New chess

A rather surprising ending, considering the source.

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Best year ever

Why 2012 was the best year ever

It may not feel like it, but 2012 has been the greatest year in the history of the world. That sounds like an extravagant claim, but it is borne out by evidence. Never has there been less hunger, less disease or more prosperity. The West remains in the economic doldrums, but most developing countries are charging ahead, and people are being lifted out of poverty at the fastest rate ever recorded. The death toll inflicted by war and natural disasters is also mercifully low. We are living in a golden age.

To listen to politicians is to be given the opposite impression — of a dangerous, cruel world where things are bad and getting worse. This, in a way, is the politicians' job: to highlight problems and to try their best to offer solutions. But the great advances of mankind come about not from statesmen, but from ordinary people.

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Dyslexic Christmas

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December 26, 2012

Keeping score

Seen in Holland

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No kissing involved, I hope

Study: Mistletoe Effective Against Colon Cancer

SOUTH AUSTRALIA, Australia (CBSDC) – Researchers at the University of Adelaide in Australia have found another purpose for mistletoe – apart from helping potential suitors steal kisses around the holidays.

Mistletoe could also be used to help the effectiveness of chemotherapy, or could even act as an alternative to chemotherapy for treatment of colon cancer, according to Newswise.

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How to light yer smoke

Or The Second Law In Action. I wonder how much he needed to eat to power the muscles to swing the hammer to heat the metal.

Via The Borderline Sociopathic Blog For Boys

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December 25, 2012

The Holly and the Ivy

One of my favorite English carols, when performed by a choir.

If you have trouble understanding the lyrics here's what they're singing.

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Any dose would be an overdose IMO

Brussels sprouts 'overdose' hospitalised man at Christmas, report reveals

A man from Ayrshire had to be hospitalised after eating too many Brussels sprouts last Christmas, it has emerged.

The traditional Christmas vegetable contain lots of vitamin K which promotes blood clotting.

However, this counteracted the effect of anticoagulants the man was taking because he had a mechanical heart. [...]

The case was reported in a festive edition of the Medical Journal of Australia.

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Fa-ra-ra-ra-ra

A Facebook sign for this Chinese restaurant in DeKalb, Illinois.

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If you haven't seen the movie, here's the back story.

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December 24, 2012

Merry Christmas from 1957

Via The Bleat

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Gingerbread architecture

1 of 25 Amazing Gingerbread Houses

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Ho F'ing Ho

Judge Rules Louisiana Woman Can Design Christmas Lights To Flip Off Neighbors

A district court judge rule this week that a Louisiana woman could hang her Christmas lights in the shape of a middle finger, as a nasty holiday "greeting" to her neighbors. Police initially threatened to arrest Sarah Childs for her illuminated display, but with the help of the ACLU, Child won her suit against the city.

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December 21, 2012

Gonna find out who's naughty or nice

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Via Miss Cellania

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Good Lord!

Nathan Grindal Kicked Out Of Darts Tournament For Looking Like Jesus

Looking like Jesus turned out to be a cross to bear for Nathan Grindal, whose resemblance to the King of Kings caused him to be kicked out of a darts tournament in Somerset, Great Britain.

Grindal, 33, who has long hair and a full beard he started growing four months ago, was sitting in the crowd at the tournament when some nearby spectators began to chant, "Jesus! Jesus!" during the final match between Phil Taylor and Kim Huybrechts, ABC News reported.

Others joined in the chant, until most of the 4,500 people in the arena were chanting the Almighty's name.

It got so raucous that security staff decided to remove Grindal, fearing his presence was upsetting the concentration of the players, as well as hurting the enjoyment of the viewers at home, ThisIsSomerset.co.uk reported.

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This is a switch

Usually the best thing you can say about a song played on a saw is that it's recognizable This performance, on the other hand, is very well played.

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December 19, 2012

Snowflake symmetry

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Meet Mr. HeadsetsDotCom

Florida Man Auctions Off His Last Name For $45,000

Jacksonville, FL – Jason Sadler has come up with a rather clever way to make some extra cash. The Florida man offered to legally change his last name for all of 2013 to the name of the company that offers him the most money. Sadler's last name auction ended earlier this week. HeadsetsDotCom reportedly paid $45,500 as the last name auction winner.

Beginning on January 1, Jason Sadler will officially be known as Jason HeadsetsDotCom for an entire year.

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The Snow Queen

I'm not certain but I think appeared at the Harbin Ice and Snow Festival in China

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December 18, 2012

Never too young

The book's for real.

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Happy holi-dogs

Via Ms Cellania

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You'll sleep when you're dead? Think again...

Woman charged for sex with human skeleton

A woman in western Sweden who was arrested after police found skeletons in her apartment has now been charged for using the bones as sex toys, a hobby she claimed was motivated by an interest in history.

"I have never heard of a case like this and neither have my colleagues, so I dare to say that this kind of case is quite uncommon," prosecutor Kristina Ehrenborg-Staffas told The Local.

A 37-year-old woman, who was arrested in September, was formally charged on Tuesday at the Gothenburg District Court for the crime of "violating the peace of the dead" (brott mot griftesfriden).

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December 17, 2012

Glass harp

H.T. Carol

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Where were Larry and Moe?

Man ironed face when phone rang

A Polish man is regretting trying to impress his wife by doing the housework - after ironing his face when the phone rang.

Tomas Paczkowski, 32, from Elbag, was determined to show wife Lila that he was just as good around the home as she is.

"I decided to do the ironing while she was out at work, just to prove a point," he explained. [...]

"Trouble was, I got so involved in the boxing that I wasn't really thinking about what I was doing."

"So when the phone rang I picked up the iron by mistake and pressed it to my ear. The pain was incredible."

And Mr Paczkowski added insult to injury when he sprinted to put cold water on the burn - and ran straight into the bathroom door.

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Slippin' on by on LSD

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(Title reference.)

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December 14, 2012

Geek cube decor

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Blast from the past (5)

A glimpse of the Harwell Dekatron / WITCH bursting back into life at The National Museum of Computing on 20 November 2012. The machine - the world's oldest original working digital computer dating from 1951 - can be seen at TNMOC, located on Bletchley Park, Buckinghamshire, UK.

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December 13, 2012

Look, Ma! One hand

This guy's pretty impressive.

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Incoming!

That's a pretty powerful gas cannon that can shoot a 2.5 pound can over 500 feet.

Border Patrol: Smugglers Use Cannon To Launch Cans Of Marijuana Into US

YUMA, Ariz. (AP) — U.S. Border Patrol agents say smugglers have come up with yet another creative way to get drugs in the country — a cannon.

Authorities say 33 cans of marijuana were spotted Friday in a field near where the Colorado River crosses the U.S.-Mexico border. They believe the cans were launched about 500 feet into the U.S. using a pneumatic-powered cannon.

After searching the area, agents recovered a carbon dioxide tank.

Mexican authorities were also notified and searched their side of the border.

The 85 pounds of marijuana found in the cans had an estimated value of $42,500.

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The lazy coach

This comes from The best (and worst) media errors and corrections of 2012

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December 12, 2012

Radio Flyer

"Too cool" indeed!

Via The Borderline Sociopathic Blog For Boys

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What a jewel

That Cat Is a Real Jewel: How Some Furry Friends Stay Precious

Natalie Pilon's diamond is her best friend.

Every time she looks into the ring on her finger, Ms. Pilon sees Meowy, her late beloved silver cat. Meowy really is there: The ring's two diamonds were made from her cremated remains.

"It's a little eccentric—not something everyone would do," says Ms. Pilon, a biotech sales representative in Boston, whose cat passed away last year. "It's a way for me to remember my cat, and have her with me all the time."

Via TYWKIWDBI

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A man-made cloud

One of Time magazine's Best Inventions of the Year 2012:

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That's not Photoshop. The Dutch artist Berndnaut Smilde has developed a way to create a small, perfect white cloud in the middle of a room. It requires meticulous planning: the temperature, humidity and lighting all have to be just so. Once everything is ready, Smilde summons the cloud out of the air using a fog machine. It lasts only moments, but the effect is dramatic and strangely moving.

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December 11, 2012

When shirts go bad

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Don't forget the mayonnaise

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What's that smell?

Eau de Pizza Hut

All true celebrities deserve their own perfume and Pizza Hut is no different!

What began as a fun Facebook post - with Pizza Hut asking fans just how much they loved the smell of a box of Pizza Hut pizza being opened - has materialized into Pizza Hut becoming the latest celebrity to launch its own perfume.

Introducing Pizza Hut Perfume - a brand new fragrance from Pizza Hut Canada boasting top notes of freshly baked, hand-tossed dough.

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December 10, 2012

Serious stones

WAND TV is located in Decatur, IL and The State Journal-Register is a newspaper in nearby Springfield.

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Oops (22)

18th-century French chateau bulldozed 'by mistake'

PARIS – Residents of a sleepy French village in Bordeaux have been left dumbfounded after discovering their local 18th-century chateau was completely bulldozed "by mistake."

The mayor's office in Yvrac said Wednesday that workers who were hired to renovate the grand 140,000-square-foot manor and raze a small building on the same estate in southwest France mixed them up.

"The Chateau de Bellevue was Yvrac's pride and joy," said former owner Juliette Marmie. "The whole village is in shock. How can this construction firm make such a mistake?"

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What a tattoo

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December 07, 2012

Deck the halls

A little seasonal policy wonk humor

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Inside Amazon

This is 1 of 11 pix of an Amazon warehouse.

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Stuck in the middle with you (2)

Great pic of this at the link.

Cry free-dumb! Jailbreak thwarted when overweight prisoner gets stuck in wall during attempted escape

An overweight inmate's attempts to escape jail ended in humiliation - when he got stuck in a hole he helped smash in his cell wall.

Firefighters had to free 16-stone (224 pounds - JdJ) Rafael Valadao when his belly stopped him making his break for freedom.

Prison guards compounded his embarrassment by standing round laughing as the operation to release him swung into action.

Authorities were last night hunting for a thinner cell-mate who managed to escape first.

Two other inmates waiting behind Rafael also saw their hopes of freedom thwarted by the unexpected hitch in their escape bid.

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December 06, 2012

Hang on! (2)

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Blind drunk. Literally!

Whisky saves man's eyesight after being blinded by vodka

Alcohol doesn't tend to make you see more clearly, but in Denis Duthie's case a bottle of whisky literally saved his sight.

The 65-year-old Taranaki man suddenly went blind when vodka he had been drinking reacted with his diabetes medication. He regained his sight only after hospital staff administered expensive whisky.

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Fly me to the moon

At $750 megabucks per ride, I'm guessing there won't be a lot of takers. Still, if you hit a big lottery...

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Golden Spike Company Announces Regular Trips to the Moon. Soon!

A new commercial venture will offer regular cheap(ish) trips to the surface of the moon by the end of the decade to anyone who wants to fork over the cash. The Golden Spike Company makes its official debut today at the National Press Club in Washington, D.C. in just a few minutes.

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December 05, 2012

Surprising indeed

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Pixel art

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This one shouldn't take the jury long

Robbery suspect brags on YouTube

Authorities say a woman accused of robbing a bank in eastern Nebraska posted a video on YouTube bragging about the robbery.

York County Sheriff Dale Radcliff said a copy of the video will be turned in as evidence against Hannah Sabata of Stromsburg. The 19-year-old was arrested on Wednesday in connection with a robbery the day before at the Cornerstone Bank branch in Waco. She faces robbery and theft charges.

The video was posted the same day Sabata was arrested. It shows a woman holding handwritten signs that say she robbed a bank and stole a car. The woman then holds a large bundle of cash, what she says is $6,256, in front of the camera. She also holds up what appears to be a bag of marijuana.

The video caption says, "I just stole a car and robbed a bank. Now I'm rich, I can pay off my college financial aid, and tomorrow I'm going for a shopping spree."

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December 04, 2012

Lamp

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Don't text in class

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Evidently the teacher hasn't heard this one from the a capella group Da Vinci's Notebook. Definitely NSFW.

[MP3 format.]

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December 03, 2012

Ghost train

This is 1 of 18 images

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Jeff Friesen's photography project entitled 'The Canadian: Ghost Train Crossing Canada' appears to show a train crossing Canada - but, in fact, the train is just two inches tall.

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Economics translated

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Mustache implants

Mideast men go under knife for manly mustaches

(CNN) -- Thick, handsome mustaches have long been prized by men throughout the Middle East as symbols of masculine virility, wisdom and maturity.

But not all mustaches are created equal, and in recent years, increasing numbers of Middle Eastern men have been going under the knife to attain the perfect specimen.

Turkish plastic surgeon Selahattin Tulunay says the number of mustache implants he performs has boomed in the last few years. He now performs 50-60 of the procedures a month, on patients who hail mostly from the Middle East and travel to Turkey as medical tourists.

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December 01, 2012

All he needs is some fish

Via Carpe Diem

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Leopard dreams

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