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January 31, 2013
Temptation
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Dennis, there's some lovely filth down here
Japanese Restaurant Uses Dirt as the Main Ingredient for Its Expensive DishesWhile most chefs work hard to make sure no dirt winds up in their food, at French restaurant Ne Quittez Pas, in Tokyo, Japan, dirt is actually used as a key ingredient.
Mind you, this isn't just any kind of dirt. It's a special black soil from Kanuma, Tochigi Prefecture, that's actually been tested for safety, but it's still the thing most people use to grow plants in. So how did dirt wind up on the menu of this respectable venue? Apparently, Chef Toshio Tanabe once won a cooking competition with his signature dirt sauce, and from that point on he put together an entire menu based on the unusual ingredient. Now the restaurant is offering dishes priced as high as $110 with Kanuma dirt in them.
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Free therapy
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January 30, 2013
Aww...
The Adorable Stormtrooper Photography Of Andy Wells; this is 1 of 15.
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Arma virumque cano
Mr. Marrocco was the first person to survive losing all four limbs in the war.
Iraq War Vet Brendan Marrocco Gets Double Arm TransplantA team of surgeons at Johns Hopkins Hospital has performed the hospital's first successful bilateral arm transplant -- giving two new arms to Brendan Marrocco, an Iraq war veteran.
"I feel great. I'm doing a lot better now," said Marrocco, 26, during a news conference Tuesday of his recovery from last month's procedure. "It gives me a lot of hope for the future."
Members of Marrocco's surgical team, led by Dr. W.P. Andrew Lee, provided details today in Baltimore on exactly how the doctors did the rare transplant and prevented Marrocco's body from rejecting the new limbs.
(No disrespect intended, but I just couldn't resist the pun.)
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Coffee's final frontier
Saturday Night Live's spoof.
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January 29, 2013
Unclear on the concept
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There's an app for that (7)
Penis-Measuring iPhone App Promises to Quantify Your ShortcomingsHere's an entry that's likely to get booted from Apple's App Store, but not before it leaves a trail of insecurity in its wake—the Condom Size app from VSM Enterprises, which claims to accurately measure not just the length of the male penis but also its girth.
Talk about a real junk app, am I right?
But seriously, Condom Size is billed as a useful, ahem, tool that helps men can select the proper-sized condoms for their particular brand of equipment. And that's all it will ever be used for, we're quite sure.
(What that app needs is this -- definitely NSFW -- tune.)
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Bad news
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January 28, 2013
WTF, Evolution?
That's the name of this humorous Tumblr page. Here's an example.
Sometimes evolution gets confused and puts things that look like creepy baby fingers where your face is supposed to be. Tough break, star-nosed mole.
Posted by joke du jour at 07:03 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Real woman of genius
Prostitution suspect lured into police HQSALEM -- The Civic Center in Salem looks like a nondescript building on the outside. It's the hub for city business that includes the police department.
"There's signs all over the Civic Center directing you to the police department," said Lt. Dave Okada.
Apparently those signs are not very visible. Two weeks ago, according to Okada, a detective on the street crimes unit posed as a "John" on line. He met a Portland woman who agreed to come to Salem and perform sex acts with the officers in exchange for money. [...]
That is where police arrested Smith. She missed several signs indicating she was at the actual police department. She walked by three uniformed officers.
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Freestyle wheelbarrow
Via The Sociopathic Blog For Boys
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January 26, 2013
75 large and a huge hug
Not bad for a single shot
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+10 for style
Knox woman leads deputies on lengthy pursuit, crash; never drops her beerKNOXVILLE — Despite allegedly striking a deputy's cruiser head-on, then running it off the road and leading authorities on 10-minute chase spanning two counties before crashing, she apparently never dropped her beer.
Trishia Moody, 26, of Knoxville, is charged with first offense DUI and a host of other offenses following the Monday night debacle, according to the Knox County Sheriff's Office.
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January 25, 2013
Yet more funny signs
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A real desperado
Boy fakes own kidnapping to stop parents from meeting teacherIt probably seemed like a good idea at the time. An 11-year-old Spanish boy faked his own kidnapping, according to the U.K.'s Guardian, because his mom and dad were set to meet his teacher later that day—and he didn't want to be around for the aftermath.
Needless to say, things didn't go as planned. The boy sent a text message to his father—a police officer in the northern town of Xinzo de Limia—saying he had been kidnapped and stuffed in the back of a car. His father called him immediately. The boy said he didn't know where he was being taken. He then faked phone static and hung up. Chaos ensued. [...]
The boy apparently had been terrified about the parent-teacher conference. "The child's poor school scores in recent weeks appear to explain a form of behavior that no one in Xinzo could understand," the Guardian said, explaining the quote was from a report in Spain's Voz de Galicia newspaper.
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If they could speak
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January 24, 2013
Winter fun
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The Shovel Fairy
Cleaning Fairy' busted while shovelingELYRIA, Ohio, Jan. 23 (UPI) -- Police in Ohio said a woman previously arrested for breaking into homes to clean them was arrested while shoveling strangers' driveways.
Elyria Police said they responded to a report of a "suspicious female" shoveling a home's driveway without permission Tuesday and they arrived to find Susan Warren, 53, WOIO-TV, Cleveland, reported Wednesday.
Warren was dubbed "The Cleaning Fairy" when she was busted in November 2012 for allegedly breaking into a house and cleaning it, leaving behind a handwritten bill for $75.
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Acoustic dollhouse
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January 23, 2013
Unusual sand castles
Here's 1 of 10:
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It's news to me too
Cheese fire causes traffic meltdown in Norway tunnel(Reuters) - A truckload of burning cheese has closed a road tunnel in Arctic Norway for the last six days.
Some 27 metric tons of flaming brown cheese (brunost), a Norwegian delicacy, blocked off a three-km (1.9 mile) tunnel near the northern coastal town of Narvik when it caught fire last Thursday. The fire was finally put out on Monday.
"This high concentration of fat and sugar is almost like petrol if it gets hot enough," said Viggo Berg, a policeman.
Brown cheese is made from whey, contains up to 30 percent fat and has a caramel taste.
"I didn't know that brown cheese burns so well," said Kjell Bjoern Vinje at the Norwegian Public Roads Administration.
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Double wrapped
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January 22, 2013
Another year of awesomeness
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It must have been her birthday
Drunk driver didn't know she was naked, Sparta cops say[...] Sparta police say a drunken, seemingly confused and almost completely nude woman crashed into a home's stone retaining wall early Friday morning.
At 12:53 a.m., a resident of Grove Terrace, in the Lake Mohawk section of the township, contacted police to say a white Volkswagen Jetta had just crashed into a stone retaining wall, then fled the scene, Sgt. John-Paul Beebe said.
Officer Joseph Pensado found the vehicle, and stopped it on West Shore Trail, Beebee said. Inside, he found a surprise — the driver, 36-year-old Catherine Giaquinto of Warwick, N.Y., was wearing only an unzipped jacket, Beebe said.
Pensado asked Giaquinto why she was driving in the nude, and "Giaquinto denied being completely naked," Beebe said. [...]
Pensado suspected Giaquinto was under the influence of alcohol — her speech was badly slurred and mostly unintelligible, she couldn't remember if she'd been involved in an accident and she didn't know where she was going, Beebe said.
Pensado saw a dress and other clothing in the rear passenger seat, retrieved the items and told Giaquinto to get dressed, Beebe said. It took about 10 minutes for her to do so, and when she finally did, she put her dress on inside-out, he said.
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D'oh! (5)
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January 21, 2013
Anamorphic sculpture
The Skewed, Anamorphic Sculptures and Engineered Illusions of Jonty Hurwitz
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Nice work if you can get it (8)
Verizon finds US developer outsourced his job to China so he could surf Reddit and watch cat videosNo, this is not the Onion, it's not April Fools, and I'm not making this up. All of this comes straight from Verizon, or more specifically, a case study from 2012 outlined by its security team.
The story goes a little something like this. A developer at a US-based critical infrastructure company, referred to as "Bob," was caught last year outsourcing his work to China, paying someone else less than one fifth of his six-figure salary to do his job. As a result, Bob had a lot of time on his hands; in fact, during the investigation, his browsing history revealed this was his typical work day:
9:00 a.m. – Arrive and surf Reddit for a couple of hours. Watch cat videos.
11:30 a.m. – Take lunch.
1:00 p.m. – Ebay time.
2:00 – ish p.m Facebook updates – LinkedIn.
4:30 p.m. – End of day update e-mail to management.
5:00 p.m. – Go home.[...] At the unnamed company, he apparently received excellent performance reviews for the last several years in a row, even being hailed the best developer in the building: his code was clean, well-written, and submitted in a timely fashion.
H.T. Jeff G
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How clever
All driven by one motor.
Via The Borderline Sociopathic Blog For Boys
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January 19, 2013
Funny... it doesn't look like a Cheshire to me
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YOLO
A motorcycle at the pump adjacent to mine today
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January 18, 2013
And I'll bet $1000 he can't do that again
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Dear Abby, RIP
'Dear Abby' advice columnist dies at age 94MINNEAPOLIS (AP) — Pauline Friedman Phillips, who under the name of Abigail Van Buren, wrote the long-running "Dear Abby" advice column that was followed by millions of newspaper readers throughout the world, has died. She was 94. [...]
Phillips' column competed for decades with the advice column of Ann Landers, written by her twin sister, Esther Friedman Lederer. [...]
The two columns differed in style. Ann Landers responded to questioners with homey, detailed advice. Abby's replies were often flippant one-liners.
Naturally, I thought of this:
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Foucault's pendulum
Nice animation. (What's Foucault's pendulum?)
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January 16, 2013
Snow art
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Facebook fantasy fail
They look like a cute couple.
Couple sharing same name have splitThe couple who met, fell in love and married over a shared name, have now filed for divorce. Kelly Hildebrandt and Kelly Hildebrandt have gone their separate ways.
The pair with matching names made news when they tied the knot in 2009. But the couple came to realize that sharing a name wasn't enough to keep them together. "She's a Florida girl, and I'm a Texas guy," Kelly Carl told Miami news station NBC 6. "We really did come from pretty different worlds."
The romance started in the same world: Facebook. One night in 2008, Kelly Katrina was curious and bored. Wondering if anyone on the website shared her name, she typed it into the search engine on the social networking site and up popped Kelly Carl.
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No cup is safe
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January 15, 2013
Not the clingy kind of static
Via TYWKIWDBI
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Just use Photoshop
'Stand closer to the rhino' results in grave woundJOHANNESBURG (AP) -- When do you not listen to the African wildlife expert? When he tells you to stand closer to the rhino. [...]
The Beeld newspaper reported Tuesday that Chantal Beyer said the game park owner snapped pictures and suggested that she "stand just a little bit closer" seconds before the attack. [...]
The paper said that just after the photo was snapped, the rhino attacked, and its horn penetrated Beyers' chest from behind, resulting in a collapsed lung and broken ribs, the paper said.
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Und so weiter
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January 14, 2013
Word
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Catchy name
Ely bakery finds success with Crapola granolaA party joke has grown into a serious venture -- or as serious as you can be, when you've named your signature product Crapola granola -- for Brian and Andrea Strom, the husband-and-wife team behind Brainstorm Bakery in Ely, Minn.
The Stroms had never owned a business or given it much thought before Brian's late-night wisecrack about making cranberry-apple granola and calling it Crapola. [...]
Initial sales at a local farmers market and arts festival were encouraging, and an on-air mention by Jay Leno just a few months after the product launched in 2007 generated wider interest. Flush with that early success, Crapola now is in more than 100 retail locations in Minnesota, Wisconsin, Iowa, South Dakota, California and Oregon.
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World's shortest runway
Via The Borderline Sociopathic Blog For Boys
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January 11, 2013
Cheating the cube
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Freezer Fridays
1 of 10 drawings on a freezer door.
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Beat paper scissors
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January 10, 2013
Don't be late
A funny Facebook post
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People of Walmart
Woman Rams Pedestrian With Her Car In Altercation Over Parking SpaceWhat started as a kind gesture for a pregnant friend ended with a road-rage altercation in a Walmart parking lot.
A Georgia teenager wanted to save a parking space for a pregnant friend, so she wouldn't need to walk too far to the store. But before her friend arrived, a woman driving an SUV arrived and wanted the spot.
A dispute ensued, and it ended when the woman rammed the teenager out of the spot with her car, according to police.
"She told her to move and then she pulled into the parking spot and hit her with the tire of the vehicle," Bartow County Sheriff's Office investigator Jonathan White told the Atlanta Journal-Constitution. "They did see scuff marks on the victim's knee, which was consistent with the height of the tire during that incident."
Deputies arrested Angela Cornett, a member of the Bartow County school board.
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Mean Tweets
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January 09, 2013
Each app is a tablet
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Roger the 'sounds preposterous'
AIG, saved by US bailout, now considers suing US governmentThe directors of insurance giant AIG plan to meet Wednesday to consider joining a lawsuit against the US government, arguing that federal officials imposed unfair terms on the company while rescuing it from collapse during the financial crisis.
On its face, the idea sounds preposterous.
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TGFB (15)
Sign outside a butcher shop
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January 08, 2013
WoW
Man hires 'assassin' to kill son's WoW avatarEven paranoiacs have enemies - and if you find that strangers keep attacking you in online games, there just may be a reason.
According to reports, a man in China became so exasperated by the amount of time that his unemployed son was spending playing World of Warcraft that he decided to do something about it. It seems that the lad had quit a software development job after just three months, and was doing nothing to find another one.
Showing, perhaps, a rather limited understanding of how these things work, Mr Feng hoped that killing the 23-year-old's character off repeatedly would put him off playing altogether - and hired virtual assassins to do just that.
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Colors of the day
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A master at going faster (2)
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January 04, 2013
Time-lapse review
This is one of the six clips in a collection at mental_floss: The Late Movies: Best Timelapses of 2012.
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Correlation
An interesting graph via reddit.
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Oops (23)
'Paid plaintiff' - nice work if you can get, I suppose.
Animal rights group settles lawsuit with RinglingWASHINGTON—An animal rights group will pay Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus $9.3 million to settle a lawsuit the circus filed after courts found that activists paid a former circus worker for his help in claiming the circus abused elephants.
The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals said Friday it was not admitting any wrongdoing in settling the lawsuit. The New York-based animal rights group was one of several involved in a lawsuit filed in 2000 against the circus' owner, Feld Entertainment Inc., claiming elephants were abused. Courts later found that the animal rights activists had paid a former Ringling barn helper involved in the lawsuit at least $190,000, making him "essentially a paid plaintiff" who lacked credibility.
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January 03, 2013
Ethical question
What if you were playing in the club championship tournament finals and the match was halved at the end of 17 holes.
You had the honor and hit your ball a modest two hundred fifty yards to the middle of the fairway, leaving a simple six iron to the pin.
Your opponent then hits his ball, lofting it deep into the woods to the right of the fairway.
Being the golfing gentleman that you are, you help your opponent look for his ball.
Just before the permitted five minute search period ends your opponent says, "Go ahead and hit your second shot and if I don't find it in time, I'll concede the match."
You hit your ball, landing it on the green, stopping about ten feet from the pin.
About the time your ball comes to rest, you hear your opponent exclaim from deep in the woods:
"I found it!".
The second sound you hear is a click, the sound of a club striking a ball and the ball comes sailing out of the woods and lands on the green, stopping no more than six inches from the hole.
Now here is the ethical dilemma:
Do you pull the cheating bastard's ball out of your pocket and confront him with it or do you keep your mouth shut?
H.T. Tucson John
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Look out!
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Look! Up in the sky! (2)
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January 02, 2013
Sweet
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Peacock in flight
One of five images here. No one seems to know the source of these.
H.T. SteveR
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Splish splash (3)
Nearly a dozen people rescued from icy CA lakeWRIGHTWOOD, Calif. - December 29, 2012 (WPVI) -- A scary slip on thin ice led to chain reaction panic in California, with close to a dozen people falling through the ice.
The desperate cries for help began when one man on a sledding excursion in California fell through the ice.
Others frantically tried to rescue him, but one-by-one they plunged into the icy water themselves.
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January 01, 2013
Happy New Year
At the Seattle Space Needle.
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Don't neglect your mother
China requires adult children to visit elderly parents or face lawsuitBEIJING — Visit your parents. That's an order.
So says China, whose national legislature on Friday amended its law on the elderly to require that adult children visit their aged parents "often" — or risk being sued by them.
The amendment does not specify how frequently such visits should occur.
State media say the new clause will allow elderly parents who feel neglected by their children to take them to court. The move comes as reports abound of elderly parents being abandoned or ignored by their children.
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Ultimate Fails
Ouch!
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